Life's Hidden Door

As I have gotten older I have learned many things, and one of those things is the ability to grow. You might think what is the ability to grow? Can't you already do that? Well, the way I see it, you grow physically without thinking, but you have to learn how to grow emotionally/intellectually. I've learned many things throughout my life and I'm excited to learn more. Recently I was with a friend and she told me something I thought I should share. She said "the only constant in life is change." So when I say I learned about the ability to grow, it means I now let myself change and expect the changes to come. 

As I have been around people I have observed that the people that don't progress or the people that become more stagnant in life seem to be more depressed and have a harder time with life. It's almost like we have an unspoken agreement with life: if we progress, then will be more happy, but if we stop or give up then life will just be a little darker. 

I feel like we as humans need to grow, we need to change, we need to have a purpose. Without those things we simply feel lost.

One of the biggest things I have seen that is able to change my life is the influence of other people. Others have always been an influence on me. From the moment I was born, my parents were a great influence. My parents helped me learn how to grow, how to improve, and how to recognize opportunities to change. Throughout my life, family and friends have always been there for me, too. They have helped me see my strengths, weaknesses, and everything in between. They have helped me see things I want to do and be, and the opposite is true as well. The biggest thing that has changed my life would be my relationships. Girls have always been in my life. I have four sisters for crying out loud! But I am mostly referring to the more romantic relationships I have experienced.

When I first found myself in a relationship, it was like opening a door I've never seen in my house, emotionally speaking. It changed my life, I learned more about myself, I felt the strong emotion of love for the first time. Since then I have been through a few more relationships, I've been hurt...bad, I have been the happiest I've ever been through some. To be honest I wouldn't change a thing, because I want to remember the mistakes I've made so I won't make them again. I want to keep the scars.

So here are some of the lessons I've learned from those scars.

You should never get into a relationship with the intent to change the person. Because you want to change them so you could be more comfortable, and if they don't change them, than your uncomfortable. Not good.

Don't let things become more physical than emotional. How to know: When you find yourself looking more forward to touching them rather than being with them. I good rule to follow: Make sure you do more things together and not let there be much of a chance to be physical. Something to help with that is RAM (Relationship Attachment Model).

Here is something I have learned about going on dates. You need to make sure that they are planned, paid for, and that your paired off. The three P's of success. By following this it will help you form better relationships. Because this will give you more of on opportunity to get to know them and a smaller chance to make it more about the physical. 

Thanks for reading.